Adoption Agency Ratings

I will briefly state my dealings with Adoption Advantage because I promised to do so. I did not contract them after all because I felt they were trying to take advantage of us.

--- When I initially contacted AA I spoke with Karen. Karen was, or is, a heartwarming sounding person, someone you can trust with your life. She sent me a copy of the contract on a Friday and urged me to hurry up and sign it so I can pick-up any BMs that come in over the weekend. But we didn't like the way the contract left us open and unprotected. While contemplating the signing of it, Karen called to tell us about a young mother who was pregnant again but could not parent another child. We were not yet clients as we did not sign the contract but she was calling us to see if we were interested. She said it was an agency match and that the mother was due Sept 1. I was overjoyed with the prospect of having a baby to love so quickly in our searching efforts with them.

That night when we spoke, she said the mother was due on Aug 16, and when I questioned her she said she had gotten her confused with another birth mom that she was also trying to match. I had to ask her about that mom as well, of course, I just couldn't leave it alone and after hearing all about her couldn't decide between both moms and asked if I could adopt both children. After she gets the ok from the director she said she would send me the new contract with the new agency fee asking for all the money upfront for two adoptions minus a discount. I was on cloud nine and called my social worker (independent) to tell her the great news and that she would have to update my homestudy for them.

My social worker was not comfortable with any of it, and questioned about the fact that I was not only being offered a BM so quickly and possibly ahead of their other clients, but two. She wondered, don't they have other clients that they can offer these BM to, why you if you are not their clients yet. None of this had crossed my mind, I was just happy to have been chosen.

I began going back and forth with Karen on the contract trying to decide if they were trying to deceive me or did they really have two Moms’ for us. She kept warning that they have to match their BMs within 24 hrs and kept telling me that she could not continue to make these BMs wait for us any longer, although she did, but the urgency to make a decision quick was always there. My social worker cautioned me that they may be trying to lure me in for the fee and then tell me later that the mothers had changed their minds and keep me on a waiting list until they really do have a situation for us and that it could be years and that I would have no way of proving that they had, in fact done this. So naturally I want to speak to the BMs, I want to know for sure.

Karen can sense my apprehension with all my questions and tells me that she's going to have me talk to Stephanie who deals directly with the BMs and could answer any questions I have. She was really sweet about it and I felt I was talking to my loving Aunt who was going to help me.

Stephanie on the other hand was the opposite of Karen, she was a fast talker and although had a lot to say, actually said very little, she reminded me of a used-car salesman. I realized Stephanie was the closer of this deal and, in fact, was the killer of the deal. She would not let me speak to the BMs and said that no one is really matched until they have signed the contract first and paid the agency fee. When I protested that it was Karen who contacted me with a BM match for me, she said that when they have a BM who has not chosen any of the parents on file, that it is then that they do an agency match.

So, am I being matched or not? Were there really two mothers who did not pick from the current parent profiles and that's why Karen called me? Had they asked all the waiting couples that I have read about on this website and they had all declined? If they did have no one else for these moms, why then would they not work with us to make us feel more secure? Why the objection to produce the proof? Was this a classic case of Bait and Switch? You be the judge.